I LOST MY SOUL

(oops, apologies, typo)

Screen Shot 2019-04-20 at 09.37.10SOLE

a few weeks back, on a walk out in the countryside (you know how it is—winter, soggy sheep, disconsolate cows and strict grass rationing when they need it most) (raw turnips—yeuch!).

and HALLELUJAH!

the bugger turns up again as the summer growth dies off to reveal it … not that I wanted my sole back. I no longer believe in soles (aaaah, soles!)

But then I got all metaphorical and philosophicule and stuff:

Is this The Lord revealing to me, in metaphorical or otherwise allegorical form? My prodigal sole returneth, and stuff? And then I thought “Stuff this stuff, Dog—there’s a whole universe out there, so give it away to those who need it and carpe the diem!”

A RELIGIOUS ENLIGHTENMENT

even a satori, no less. But—

—sadly there was no-one around to bite. Dammit, never a witness when ya needs one—so if I wrote a Book of Revelation, who would believe me? All I’d need would be just a first devoted few and ever expanding MLM downlines. Tax breaks too, for Dog’s sake.

Hell, Dog—play ’em right and you too could live in a palace and have a fleet of subscriber-funded jets …

So I went home where The Spouse made me a coffee using the miracle of electricity and piped waters … so join with me in praising Our Lord, from whom all blessings flow!

Screen Shot 2019-04-16 at 10.08.04

“Is this sarcasm, Dog? It doesn’t become you …”

 

Wag wag wag wag …

 

Screen Shot 2019-04-07 at 19.05.49.png

(Image at top courtesy of me—it was the glue shed along with my sole …)

4 thoughts on “I LOST MY SOUL

    1. Welcome, Bruvver … to the arms of The Lord. You are almost qualified to join me in prayer; and for a wee donation sufficient to cover my costs you can be appointed a genuine bishop in the Holey Church of God and allowed to tithe on behalf of your own diocese (tax-free).

      Like

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