So I’ll open with a chestnut that seemed ever so funny, once—

ME:  When is a door not a door?

Victim:  Glop?

ME:  Give up?

Victim:  If I have to?

ME: (triumphantly) When it’s ajar! Boom boom! Gotcha!

Moving on … think ‘variation on a theme’, but this time in all seriosity and with no traps in mind (and no puns intended, I promise you*).



onboard desktop dictionary now serves as point of entry to my theme for the day. Using it and our own experiences, what can we deduce about ‘door’, hmmm?

“Mr Argus, Sir?” (Oh goodie … it’s little Virginia again)

“Yes, Cutie?”

“Sir—are you alluding to the fact that doors can be opened?”

“Bingo, Kid! Brilliant as well as perstifero  gorgeous. Furthermore, yes~!”

“Awww, shucks, Sir …”

True, too. Doors serve the useful function of being openable as well as blocking passage.

If you can’t open a door, is it still a door?

Brrrrr. So?

So let me draw your attention to one of the unresolved mysteries of our time. Ever heard of Wepwawet?

Ol' Weppie.png

No, not many have. But quite a few are/were aware that one Rudolph Gantenbrink esq. drove a wee robotic device of his own devising up one of the mystery shafts in the GP of E at Giza.

They named the wee beastie Upuaut** and it performed beautifully, toddling up the shaft like a bought one until it reached an unexpected blocked up road-block. Not good. It snapped the now iconic image of the road-block, which was promptly named ‘Door’—


—by almost everyone referring to it. Okay then — everyone. Picky

The above snap is one from Upuaut and appears on Gantenbrink’s own site, more accurately labelled as ‘stone slab’. I like that—doors can be opened, slabs are a bit unequivocal that way.

We are also told that those apparent artefacts on the slab are copper handles. I put this suggestion in my “Awwww … gimme a break!” box.

To my uneducated eye they look more like yer basic electrical contacts, which would be pushing the limits of fancy a bit far ‘cos the ancients never had no electricity***.

They (moderns) could always sail another (more recent) robot up to that putative door and slap a multimeter across those handles, check for any signs of electrical potentials and/or resistivity. Perhaps (this is the CT in me coming out now) ‘they’ have already done that, shivered, and shut the project down? Who knows****?


that ol’ Gantenbrink wanted to do a lot more with upgraded robots but got promptly banned from the site by everyone’s favourite ol’ buddy (Zahi Hawass); which the CT in me thinks was for obvious but unmentionable reasons. I guess we’ll never know.

It’s years since I’ve been this way, so I’ll have to do some updating; don’t wait up …

GP of E at G.png

the Great Pyramid of Giza

buitre16 Ye gods. From all the burbling literature one could expect something a bit more impressive than a cute little pile of rubble, no?


* Trap … door? Trapdoor? Get it? Ohhhhh … dunno why I bovver, Guv~!

** Guess how it’s pronounced?

*** Someone said that the (now lost~!) ‘Baghdad battery’ could equally be a pickle jar …

**** And how the hell would we ever know? (Dammit—we need a few more Snowdens.)


3 thoughts on “IT’S CHESTNUT

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